It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

-- Anonymous
Laughs
3644
I Laughed
Author: Chris Jun 5, 2007
Views: 1938

Entertainment is a thing of the past, today we've got television.

-- Archie Bunker
Laughs
4218
I Laughed
Author: Chris Jun 5, 2007
Views: 3360

The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job. But if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.

-- Jeff Foxworthy
Laughs
3681
I Laughed
Author: Chris Jun 5, 2007
Views: 2222

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and that's the best they're going to feel all day.

-- Dean Martin
Laughs
3718
I Laughed
Author: Chris Jun 5, 2007
Views: 2886

A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says "Okay, let's get started."

-- Henny Youngman
Laughs
3600
I Laughed
Author: Chris Jun 5, 2007
Views: 2086

Actually, it only takes one drink to get me loaded. Trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or fourteenth.

-- George Burns
Laughs
3611
I Laughed
Author: Chris Jun 5, 2007
Views: 2212