In democracy it's your vote that counts; In feudalism it's your count that votes.

No matter how rich you become, how famous or powerful, when you die the size of your funeral will still pretty much depend on the weather.

The Constitution gives every American the inalienable right to make a damn fool of himself.

The only winner in the War of 1812 was Tchaikovsky.

Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.

It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But the half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.