Quotes - Top Rated

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.

-- Homer Simpson
Laughs
603
I Laughed
Author: Chris May 31, 2007
Views: 455

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.

-- Jackie Mason
Laughs
507
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Aug 13, 2007
Views: 241

If I can't get the girl, at least give me more money.

-- Alan Alda
Laughs
504
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Aug 12, 2007
Views: 174

I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.

-- Anonymous
Laughs
451
I Laughed
Author: Chris Jul 9, 2007
Views: 319

There are 350 varieties of shark, not counting loan and pool.

-- LM Boyd
Laughs
385
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Aug 9, 2007
Views: 186

I am thankful for the taxes I pay because it means that I'm employed.

-- Nancie J. Carmody
Laughs
379
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Aug 7, 2007
Views: 169