Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back.

Entertainment is a thing of the past, today we've got television.

I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job. But if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?