There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job. But if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.

Whose cruel idea was it to put an "S" in the word "Lisp"?

Honk if you love peace and quiet.

If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either.