Quotes - Popular

If the Phone Doesn't Ring, It's Me.

-- Jimmy Buffett
Laughs
5523
I Laughed
Author: Goofy Jan 14, 2008
Views: 3641

I don't own a cell phone or a pager. I just hang around everyone I know, all the time. If someone wants to get a hold of me, they just say 'Mitch,' and I say 'what?' and turn my head slightly.

-- Mitch Hedberg
Laughs
3500
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Aug 7, 2007
Views: 3042

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and that's the best they're going to feel all day.

-- Dean Martin
Laughs
3513
I Laughed
Author: Chris Jun 5, 2007
Views: 2746

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans are suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.

-- Rita Mae Brown
Laughs
3325
I Laughed
Author: Chris May 31, 2007
Views: 2177

Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.

-- Jef Raskin
Laughs
4586
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Feb 1, 2008
Views: 2142

Thanks to the Interstate Highway System, it is now possible to travel from coast to coast without seeing anything.

-- Charles Kuralt
Laughs
4389
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Jan 22, 2008
Views: 2076