Indecision may or may not be my problem.

-- Jimmy Buffett
Laughs
3701
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Jan 24, 2008
Views: 1489

Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother's tasted better the day before.

-- Rita Rudner
Laughs
3545
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Jan 24, 2008
Views: 1382

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.

-- Joan Rivers
Laughs
3567
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Jan 24, 2008
Views: 1502

Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's one marked 'Brightness,' but it doesn't work.

-- Gallagher
Laughs
5211
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Jan 22, 2008
Views: 3116

Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.

-- Woody Allen
Laughs
4019
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Jan 19, 2008
Views: 1610

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.

-- Mark Twain
Laughs
3816
I Laughed
Author: The Idiot Aug 13, 2007
Views: 1582